Likely Miscarriage

Our doctor left a voicemail with the results back from the blood test yesterday and it confirmed what I had feared. My number was unchanged from last test.

The doctor said the number should have doubled by now and with it being the same it is highly unlikely that the baby will continue to grow (he has never seen it happen). I will likely miscarry in the next two weeks. (This is a very helpful article in getting more information on what is likely happening.)

We are completely devastated… there are no words to describe the pain. In some ways it doesn’t feel real yet. I’m still experiencing all the pregnancy symptoms I was before which makes it even harder to believe. I’m sure a new wave of pain is coming when(if) I get my period.

The baby was/is 4 weeks along as it’s counted (they count from the first day of the last period).

I will go in Monday morning for a repeat blood test to see where the numbers are at. I’m not very hopeful because the urine tests that I’m still taking (hoping to see an increase ) are continuing to fade. We can barely see the second line now.

unnamed

Tests- Top is Wednesday night, Bottom is Friday night.

Baby, I’m so sorry you aren’t growing. I don’t understand why this had to happen. I hope that in the brief time you got to spend with us you felt loved. We will always remember the day we found out about you and are so sorry that the plans we had for you likely are not going to come to be.

 

 

*Just wanted to add this link to something Scott and I both read and think is a true list (it applies to the infertility stuff too). It’s not directed at anyone (so if you’ve said any of this don’t feel bad). Just read it and thought it was highly applicable and might help someone in the future if you’re lost for words (as I know I was when our niece was stillborn). It would have been nice to have been able to read this then.

 

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